Nothing to Eat after 8:45PM (Post 30)

Tomorrow I go in and I lose my hormones!  I am a little freaked out.  I would be lying if I wasn’t!!! 

The BRCA2 boobs had to go, no reservations!  I feel like I just powered though that experience horrible tubes and all.  I went back to work, I went in for my boob fills, I vacationed with my family, and I anticipated this day the day I get my permanent implants.  On this day when my boobs are made whole again,  I take out my life giving organs.  

My ovaries, Fallopian tubes and uterus are what helped me make and sustain the life of both of my children.  I am not trying to make more as I am 43 years old but, it is so final the removal of these parts.  It shouldn’t be a big deal but I am struggling with the loss of my hormones.  Your body needs those and I can’t just replace them with the kind they prescribe you.  I know I will be okay I just hate the unknown.  What lies on the other side of my BRCA2 ovaries being removed is scary to me.

I decided to keep a journal.  I am not sure if it will be here or an actual journal.  I am nervous about what happens without hormones, will I be crazy, will I be depressed, hot flashes, and weight gain? For now I am a passenger in this journey.  The removal of these ovaries reduces my cancer risk from 62% to almost nothing. Whatever lies in the otherside of having ovaries is significantly better than chemo and death.  

Today I will be brave and follow through with this procedure that will most definitely change the trajectory of my life.  I have had terrible pain in every cycle of my post child birth life. Heavy periods, ablation, laparoscopic surgery, so uterus my friend you are going with your fellow lady parts.  I gladly part ways with you and I bid you adue!